Mon, 19 February 2007 I always get so excited to get a show out, but this is a really energetic show. Featuring: Intro: Psykosoul Check out the Joe Rogan video here Download the show - HERE I know my place in the big, bad world of entertainment; I'm like a drop in an ocean of talented whales and sharks where I don't even amount to the size of plankton. I understand this, but thanks to Al Gore, who created the internet, even a little plankton like me gets to swim free in the deep depths of the entertainment sea, with my little tail wagging in the tide, my little plankton antennae searching out little bits of plankton food. Ok, that is the stupidest analogy I have ever written. Jeez, oh man, where am I going with this I mean sure its cheap and easy to call Rosie O'Donnell a fat whale, Andy Dick a sucker-fish and Joan Rivers a Crab, and Bill O'Reilly a piece of crap. Actually, I can call Bill O'Reilly that on dry land too, but the point being, it's a stupid analogy. The point being is that I know my place in the big bad world of professional comedy. Generally, my place has never been to be the one on stage. My place has been in the cheap seats, crying over the goddamn two drink minimum and the lousy service. But like the guys who sit in the stands at the Yankee games who think they can manage better than Joe Torre, I have every right to get up and yell and scream every time I see a bad play. Carlos Mencia is a no-good, lying, dog, scab, the white puss that comes out of an infected canker sore, hack of a comic, that should be playing the Olive Garden rather than Madson Square Garden. You may ask? Jersey Todd, what exactly did Mr. Mencia do to you? Well, nothing personally, but when has that ever mattered on this show. What matters is what the modern day Sinbad allegedly does to other comedians that has me all riled up, and if you didn't notice it, I just did it, too. You see the line that I just told about Carlos playing the Olive Garden rather than Madison Square Garden, is a joke that I picked up off of the Opie and Anthony Show. It's a fantastic line, and as much as I would have like to have thought of it, I didn't and that's why they have a multi-million dollar contract and why I have boxes of Splenda being mailed to me. But the difference is that Carlos Mencia robs other comedians like he was Bonnie and Clyde . Actually, I don't know if he's Bonnie or Clyde, but it doesn't matter, because I'm not sure whether he is entirely sure about his sexuality, either. A little bit of background is in order. Carlos Mencia is a pretty well known comic. He's got a show on Comedy Central called Mind of Mencia, which I guess Comedy Central put up there after Dave Chappelle lost his mind. According to Radar Magazine, which I am very happy to say is back in publication, after almost ripping me off, and they have an excellent article this month about comics ripping off other comics and I find it fascinating, and rather than me ripping off the article entirely and claiming it as my own, lets just say it runs through the history of joke stealing from such master criminals as Milton Berle to Robin Williams, to Dane Cook, to Dennis Leary, but the one that stood out for me is Carlos Mencia, or should call him by what other comedians call him, "Mensteala." You see, I have no bridges to burn. I'm not even sure if I could find the road to get near the bridge to burn it. I don't even know where to get the ez-pass to get to the bridge that I need to burn. Jeez, that's horrible, I am like analogy-impaired tonight, but the reality is that where some comedians are probably scared that Menstealia would use whatever entertainment pull he has to hurt their careers, I have no desire to go into comedy as a way to feed my family. No, I have chosen the three ring circus of Workers' Compensation law for that source of fun and hilarity. Let me just read you this: "Comedy Central star Carlos Mencia is almost universally reviled. According to Rogan, the famed Comedy Store in Los Angeles has even instituted a Mencia early-detection. "Every time he walks in, the guys in the cover booth just start yelling 'Mencia's here!'" he says. Nick Di Paolo claims the Comedy Central star also swiped material from him, and notes that "every Latino comic wants to kill him." One in particular is sitcom star George Lopez, who told Howard Stern last year that Mencia stole 13 minutes of his act for an HBO special, inspiring him to pay Mencia a personal visit. "I just had enough," Lopez recalled. "So one night at the Laugh Factory, I just picked him up and slammed him against the wall." Even since the article came out, Mencia apparently has no shame, this past week Joe Rogan, the host of Fear Factor on NBC and an even better stand-up in his own right, confronted Mencia on stage at the Comedy Store in Los Angeles. You can see a clip of the whole exchange on Joe's web site, and I'll put a link to it on my page, but Rogan essentially gave Mencia a verbal beat down that would have made Alan Dershowitz proud. Mencia, who's apparently really named Ned, and is half German, basically had no comprehensible answers to Joe's accusations, and basically came off like Anna Nicole Smith at a deposition. I'm saying Anna Nicole now, not two weeks ago, now. Speechless. Maybe Menstelia thought that he could get away with it, but to quote the great American philosopher, Mr. Michael Tyson, "everyone has a plan until they get punched." But lets take a quick right turn back on to the highway of this story. What's even more amazing is that according to Joe's Website, there really are no repercussions to Ned. He's going to go on the same way that he always has, and probably stealing other people's jokes. In the meantime, Joe has been asked to take a break from the comedy store, and is now doing some shows at the improv, and it blows me away that the victim is ultimately the one who's punished. You see, joke stealing is a crime. Its plagiarism. Not only is it morally wrong, but in a world where morals have as much respect as Tim Hardaway at a GLAAD convention, it's also potentially legally wrong, too. The Radar article goes on to say how Robin Williams and Lorne Michaels have paid comedians off to avoid being sued. Of course, it does mention how WC Fields paid people to break other comedian's legs, which in New Jersey is of course an acceptable remedy, too. In the end, and I know that no comedian is going to come out and say this, but the onus, and who doesn't like a little onus every once in a while, ultimately fall on the Comedy Clubs to make a tad of an effort to police this kind of thing. Now, I realize that it would be virtually impossible and potentially harmful for the clubs to pre-screen every act that hits the stage, but where there a known fox in the hen house, the club really has to make some sort of effort to keep these poachers out. It's like bringing Lindsey Lohan to an open bar - you just know that nothing good is going to come from it. More importantly, by not policing it somehow, the Comedy Clubs devalue the originality, the creativity, and the uniqueness of each comedian, and thereby reduce the value of their product. Maybe it's the "Wal-Marting" of comedy. Maybe ultimately, you'll not only be able to go into a comedy club in New York and hear the exact same routine that you would in Alabama, even down to the same jokes. Maybe this is exactly why Kramer went crazy on-stage. Stand-up comedy and stand up comedy has gotten so wide spread that every minor metropolis with a population has a comedy club in it. Trust me, if you go into the Whack-Shack in Tuscaloosa or Bananas in Buffalo, you're gonna hear some comedian talking about the differences between white people and black people, or some female comic being shocking by saying the V word or somebody making jokes about President Bush. In the end, because there are so many outlets for comedy and so many professional comedians, the product is more watered down than the Vodka at a Mormon's Christmas party.Maybe, the comedy clubs condone stealing because when it all gets watered down, going to a comedy club will be like going to McDonalds, and you'll be happy with getting the same meal every time, and they'll be happy to serve it to you because you'll pay for it. But I will say this, when the day comes that people realize that even at the comedy clubs, they are getting the same homogenized, processed, non-original crap that they can get anywhere else, then it is on that day that the Plankton shall rule the ocean! Man, five minutes later, and that analogy is still stupid. Anyway, I'm Jersey Todd, and "Peace and Be Wild", and "we'll all get together again and talk about some more shit", and of course "Tailwinds." Category: general -- posted at: 9:43 PM Comments[2] |
